Friday, April 23, 2010

I posted this on another site today, and wanted to keep it on file...

4.10 Scenes that are Gay Porn Cliches and should be avoided unless you can put a fresh spin on it:
1)The Delivery Guy Scene-Pizza, Mail, Fed-Ex, whatever, but I don’t need to see any more scenes where the delivery guy rings the doorbell, the twink comes to the door in a towel and 9 seconds later they start fucking….BO-RING!
2)Anything in an auto-body or repair shop…yes, it’s hot to see guys in zip up coveralls but it’s been done to death, and seldom with much originality.
3)Military dudes in the barracks, or in a tent, or anywhere for that matter: Clicheville
4)Locker Room/Gym: Done to death and seldom original
5)Two dudes talking in a car/truck or next to it and start getting it on: the only cliche scene that I can think of, that Maestro Gage has maybe dipped into, a little too often…
6)Generic bedroom scenes: dull, dull, dull
7)Dungeon/Cage/S&M Fantasy Room…I’m not into it anyway, but can’t it be more original than a lame dark set with cages, platforms, bars and tire swings? Yawn…
8)Any sex scene that only has a few seconds of set-up…a glance, a look and the guys are naked and in the standard porn mode of 5 minutes of A sucking B; 5 minutes of B sucking A; Salad Tossing; 10-15 minutes of anal; long drawn out slo-mo cum shots repeated three or four times ….ugh.
9)Any scene involving Big Muscle Body Builder Porn Stars with tats and a thick layer of orange body spray…one or two per movie is ok; more than that: no. I don’t know any steroid taking, orange bodybuilders; I don’t fantasize about steroid taking, orange bodybuilders and I don’t have much desire to see them having dull, steroidy, orangey sex…
10)Any scene where I have to look at Michael Lucas’s smug, orange face and scary lips.

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Lost Day

It's here...

14 Things You Might Want to Know About Tonite's Two Hour Premiere Titled "LA X":

  1. A Main Character and A Guest Star we've seen before will die.

  2. You Will Cry.

  3. Smokey is a bad motherfucker in this episode.

  4. The Dead Will least 6 previously dead characters (regulars and guest stars)will be seen or HEARD alive.

  5. Yes, we DO revisit Oceanic Flight 815 but things are a bit different this time around.

  6. Rose and Bernard: yes.

  7. Cindy the Stewardess: yes.

  8. Zack and Emma: we'll see...

  9. Vincent (the dog): unknown

  10. Claire is a series regular.

  11. Desmond is seen, but he's NOT a season regular this year...

  12. Bye, Bye 1977.

  13. Hurley's Guitar Case: oh, yeah.

  14. Sayid needs some very special healing, 'cause the bastard is bleeding out...where could they go to get that kind of help? Hmmmmm....

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Stuff you really, really want to know about the next season of Lost

DANGER!!! SPOILER ALERT!!! (For those highly sensitive to such...)The first section is all stuff that has been made public, ie, either released in official press announcements or said by the producers.

1)The first episode is called LA X (I believe it's two hours, so it's LA X Parts 1 and 2)
And yes, the space between the "LA" and the "X" is intentional. We pick up right where we left off last season with Juliet blowing up a bomb in 1977 Dharma times and Un-Locke egging bitter Ben to kill the mysterious Jacob.
2)Juliet (Elizabeth Mitchell)will be back for an unknown amount of episodes (or maybe just one)but won't be a regular.
3)Nestor Carbonell aka Richard aka Manliner Man is now a series regular. We will learn a LOT more about Richard.
4)Emilie de Ravin (Claire) is back as a regular.
5)Many dead,missing and long since seen characters from the past will reappear next season. Dominic Monaghan appeared but did not speak at the Lost forum at ComicCon this year. He'll be in at least 3 episodes. Ian Somerholder (Boone, the first big Lost death)will also be back for a couple of episodes. It was not released in what capacity they would appear...flashbacks, dream sequences, ghosts, or alternate timelines.
6)At Comic Con, videos were shown of Hurley in a Mr Cluck commercial apparently filmed AFTER the successful landing of Oceanic flight 815 in Los Angeles, and a segment of America's Most Wanted featuring the actual host John Walsh focusing on the search for the notorious Kate Austen, but not for the murder of her father, as we learned in Season 1, but that of another man who was mistakenly in the house that Kate blew up. Apparently, a different alternate timeline will be explored in Season 6...
7)Producers did confirm that we will see Daniel (Jeremy Davies) again but did not specify in what capacity (flashback, dream, alternate timeline). And, we will see Desmond in LA X.


8)Maggie Grace (Shannon*, Boone's stepsister) is listed on the IMDB as being in LA X.
9)The following characters have been seen on set/location in Hawaii: Ilana, Bram, Charlie*, Boone*, Doc Arzt*, Kate's Marshall*, Frogurt*,Cindy the stewardess, Zak and Emma, Ethan*, Lapidus, Rose, Bernard, Charles Widmore. (*indicates dead characters). No word if anyone has sighted Ana* or Mr Eko*, but Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje said at Comic Con he was open to return to the show. Jorge Garcia (Hurley) said in an interview recently that it looked unlikely that Cynthia Watros (Libby*) would be returning, though her character will probably be mentioned. And Harold Perrineau (Michael*) said he is open to coming back as well, if the script is good.
10)A big Temple set has been constructed.
11)Jacob is the father of a character we already know.
12)Episode 3 is "What Kate Does" and is Kate-centric, (duh).
13)Episode 4 is "The Substitute" and is apparently Locke-centric. Locke's ladylove, played by Katey Sagal, will appear and his shitty little boss Randy Nations(who used to be Hurley's boss) played by Billy Ray Gallion.
14)Scenes are being shot that take place on the Island circa 2007 (last year, the time frame Un-Locke, Ben and Sun were in when they went to the base of the statue) with that cast but there also seems to be Island set, 2008 scenes with Jack, Kate, Hurley, Sawyer, etc meaning that they are no longer in 1978/Dharma times. And, most importantly, they are filming scenes of an alternate timeline featuring the characters AFTER Oceanic Flight 815 successfully lands in Los Angeles in 2004.
15)No word on the status of Jack's chest pelt...

Thursday, August 27, 2009

My New Favorite Website

People of Walmart

Just like life, it's heartbreaking AND hilarious and frequently both at the same time...

I originally heard about this on DListed...God bless Michael K.

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

What a lazy sumbitch I've been lately...

Sorry, but my excuses are the following:

1)Nice weather excludes blogging.

2)I've had anything worth blogging about.

3)Depression and Recession.

4)General feeling of "Why bother to blog?"

5)Why bother to write blog entries that might be a paragraph or two long when you can suffice with short sentences on Facebook or Twitter?

6)I have nothing of interest to add to the general discussions ongoing vis a vis:

a)the death of Michael Jackson
b)the death of healthcare reform in this country
c)the abundance of new dessert outlets on Capitol Hill
d)local politics
e)anything to do with reality programs

7)Hiding my true identity as Dick Whitman is exhausting and very time consuming...

That is all.

For now.

Friday, July 31, 2009


A strange thing happened to me about 4am this morning; I woke up, shivered and realized that I needed a quilt in addition to the thin, sweat soaked sheet I had been used to covering myself with for the last several was a delightful feeling.

Maybe I can work my way back to actually cooking food and taking warm showers.

Late Breaking News!

After beers, professor, officer plan to meet again; perhaps start dating.
CNN International - ‎1 hour ago‎
WASHINGTON (CNN) -- The officer who arrested a top African-American professor said talks over beers Thursday evening at the White House were productive and the two men plan to meet again at a Back Bay gay bar called Peckers. Sgt. James Crowley confided to a friend that he had long admired older, African-American men with an air of sophistication and butts that just won't quit, and Skip Gates just might be "the man of my dreams!"

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Bing is my default search engine on my workplace laptop...

but I prefer Google. I typed in Google in the Bing search window and Bing's response was they could not find a match for Google, but would I like to check out "Googles"?

How petty...

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Shhhhhh....Don't tell Mr. Poe about my new imaginary boyfriend,

Rob Fyfe the silver haired daddy/CEO of Air New Zealand...and definitely don't tell him that Mr Fyfe appears nude, except for body paint, in a new ad for Air New Zealand...

But, Jebus, the Kiwi accent IS a bit harsh isn't it?

Thursday, June 25, 2009


An angel skateboards into heaven...

I'm trying to decide between the Charlie's Angels episode where they're in the women's prison camp or the one with the roller derby theme as my favorite...they're both great!

A toast to Farrah.

Monday, June 22, 2009

Damn you, Trader Joe's!

and your delicious Pita Bite Crackers! I can't stop eating you! And you're good with EVERYTHING! Even plain, you are deliciously addictive with your sea salt dusting and slightly burnt edges. And since you're a new addition to the Trader Joe's family, I worry that you are a temporary seasonal item and that you might go away, never to be seen, or eaten, again!

I hate you and yet, I love you...

UPDATE: I guess they're not that new or seasonal but TJ's must have got a big shipment and they've been pushing them on a big end display for the last few weeks...but I do get paranoid with Trader Joe's because they HAVE taken away things I've loved in the past.